How To Resolve Conflict Using Authentic Dialogue With Someone Who Hasn’t Learned The Skill
It’s a fact of life that conflict and disagreements happen, especially when dealing with different personalities, opinions, and perspectives. But instead of trying to avoid conflict entirely, what if you could learn how to resolve it in a way that creates deeper understanding, respect, and ultimately a win-win solution? That is where authentic dialogue comes in. Authentic dialogue is a communication technique that allows each person to feel heard, appreciated, and valued, even when there is a disagreement. In this blog, we will explore how to use authentic dialogue to resolve conflict, specifically when the other person hasn’t learned the skill.
De-escalate & Invite
The first step in using authentic dialogue is to de-escalate the situation and invite the other person to participate in the process. Instead of immediately arguing, take a step back and ask the other person if you can agree to hear each other out and work towards a common ground. For example, you could say, “Hey, let's not argue or debate. Can we agree to hear each other out in order to find some common ground and then come up with a win-win solution?" Once they agree to this, it is a sign that they have accepted your invitation to an authentic dialogue.
Model
Now that the other person has accepted your invitation, it is your turn to model the skills of authentic dialogue. Start by asking the other person to speak first, and then actively listen to their perspective without interruption. Then ask empathetic questions that show that you are trying to understand their point of view. This shows that you value their opinions and ideas, even if you do not agree with them. Once they have finished speaking, remind them that you listened without interrupting and asked questions to truly understand their perspective. Then politely ask if they can do the same for you.
Propose A Solution
Once both of you have expressed how you feel about the issue, it is time to start brainstorming solutions. Begin by proposing a solution that takes both your needs and ideas into consideration. Let the other person go first and propose their ideas and suggestions. If the solution does not satisfy both parties, propose modifications that consider both perspectives. Keep doing this process until you find a solution that is agreeable to both parties. This way, you will create a win-win solution that benefits both of you.
Practice
Using authentic dialogue is a skill that needs to be practiced regularly. It is important to use this technique in your daily communication, especially in situations where conflict can quickly escalate. The more you practice, the more comfortable and confident you will be when using authentic dialogue to resolve conflicts.
Conclusion
Using authentic dialogue is a powerful communication tool that can help to resolve conflicts in a respectful and peaceful way. By de-escalating the situation, modeling empathetic listening and questioning, and proposing win-win solutions, it is possible to develop deeper understanding and respect for each other, even when dealing with disagreements. Make sure to practice this skill regularly to become more confident and comfortable in using it to resolve conflicts. Remember, by using authentic dialogue, you can turn conflict into an opportunity for growth and mutual understanding.